Cake of Doom!

First of all.
One word to say.
Whew.......
I had a terribl(y lucky)e day today. An epic day of doom, that is!
First of all.
I went to my friends house as it was his birthday. I stayed overnight and had tremendous fun. Then I was thinking. Why was there no cake?You know most birthdays have cakes(of doom)!
I asked my friend. He said,"God knows when this damn cake will be delivered. Its gonna come soon.....I hope.."
Then I could stand no more. I could rot into a skeleton anytime as there was no food to eat. I opened the door to see some cake guy holding one jumbo cake. He looked like a damn ghost who hadnt cleaned himself for ninety months!
I dragged my friend across and told him all this. He said, "What?Come already ah? So good, I become bones liao.....zzz"
Then, I let him see this crazy cake ghost of crap guy. He screamed. Then the guy was taken aback and my mother scolded me via the phone when I called her. He dropped the super-fat-jumbo-doom-delicious-crazy cake of stupidity and it damn fell on me! Luckily I dodged out of the way like what they did with the Matrix movie. My friend praised me.
Then.
Things.
THINGS WENT BAD.
My mother said,"Mop their floor. Whole house otherwise you are gonna get it from me."
I felt like I was going to die.
For sure.....
Come on, can you guys believe my luck? ZZZZZZZZ........